If you are shy, approaching women will surely be something you have difficulty with as a guy. Girls are likely to be less ambitious, but men need to quit being shy if they want any amount of results with dating.
Don’t worry, I recognize just where you’re coming from. I myself used to be seriously timid. If truth be told, I used to be so timid that most people I went to school with do not have any idea who I am. Almost everyone just saw right through me in those days. Things got a bit better while attending college, but I did not really make an effort to give up being timid until I found myself dumped by my girlfriend with only one friend in the world.
Something had to be done.
This is how I overcame shyness, and I’m going to advise you do it too in order to quit being shy and ultimately get some social self confidence:
You’ll want to start off stepping outside of your comfort zone. We are going to make this gradual so do not be worried about getting tossed into the deep end too early.
The first step I did was I decided that I would merely say “hi” to 100 people in one 7-day period. This seems like lots of work to start with. In truth, if you’re as shy as I was, this will likely seem like quite a frightening task. But make sure you bear with me.
Keep a little note card for you to record how many people you said “hello” to. The very first couple of encounters will seem very odd, but don’t quit. After a couple of times, it’ll get easier.
Greet strangers walking down the street or waiting for a bus or in line at the deli. Simply say “hello” without any anticipation of how they may answer. How they act in response implies absolutely nothing about you. You’re only being friendly. Do not forget that. How they answer only tells you what sort of person they are. If you say “howdy,” then look at it as a victory regardless of how they react.
What we are working on here is incrementally getting comfortable with the thought of reaching beyond yourself and interacting with people. You’re also teaching you one of the fundamental things you’ll discover in order to quit being timid, which is to isolate yourself from how people react to you.
When you are finished with the first week, make your aim for the second week to begin a conversation with twenty people. Keep your same attitude and simply begin something basic by making observations about things you notice. You could try “Hey, did you get the cinnamon muffin? Is it any good??” or “Hey, what book is that you are reading?”
Once again, we are getting you to give up being timid by reaching outside your personal comfort zone. Don’t worry about approaching women that you want to go out with. Speak to anyone and everyone. If you can perfect this talent on men and elderly people, then you’ll be ready to be friendly and social when it matters-when you notice a girl you want to meet.
This is how I taught myself to quit being timid. It’s going to really work if you keep at it. So choose to take 2 weeks to begin pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone. It may seem hard at the beginning, but I promise you that the anxiety vanishes entirely after a short time and, believe it or not, it will indeed become fun to meet new people.
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